「1分钟英语小笑话」有没有英语的带中文的1分钟左右的小笑话
东东笑话网 ??03-15
有没有英语的带中文的1分钟左右的小笑话
Like Father ,Like Son (有其父必有其子) One day ,Mr.Read found a litter boy in his apple tree.He got very angry and shouted ,"Hey,get down at once ,or I'll have a word with your father !" But the boy ,without stopping eating the apple ,raised his head towards the branches above and said ."Dad ,get down .A guy under the tree wants to have a word with you!" 有其父必有其子 一天,瑞德先生看见一个小男孩在他家苹果树上,他很生气就对那个男孩大喊:“,嘿!你给我立马滚下来,否则我就告诉你爸爸去!” 但是,男孩还不停的吃着苹果,抬头朝这上面树枝上的父亲说道:“爸爸,你下来,树下有个家伙想和你谈一谈!” 1.猴子捞月 One day, a little monkey is playing by the well. 一天,有只小猴子在井边玩儿。 He looks in the well and shouts: 它往井里一瞧,高喊道: "Oh! My god! The moon has fallen into the well!" “噢!我的天!月亮掉到井里头啦!” An older monkey runs over, takes a look, and says: 一只大猴子跑来一看,说, "My goodness! The moon is really in the water!" “糟啦!月亮掉在井里头啦!” An oldest monkey comes over. 老猴子也跑过来。 He is very surprised as well and cries out: 他也非常惊奇,喊道: "The moon is in the well." “糟了,月亮掉在井里头了!” A group of monkeys run over to the well. 一群猴子跑到井边来, They look at the moon in the well and shout: 他们看到井里的月亮,喊道: "The moon did fall into the well! Come on! Let's get it out!" “月亮掉在井里头啦!快来!让我们把它捞起来!” Then, the oldest monkey hangs on the tree up side down, with his feet on the branch, 然后,老猴子倒挂在大树上, and he pulls the next monkey's feet with his hands. 拉住大猴子的脚。 All the other monkeys follow his suit, 其他的猴子一个个跟着, and they join each other one by one down to the moon in the well. 它们一只连着一只直到井里。 Just before they reach the moon, the oldest monkey raises his head and happens to see the moon in the sky. 正好他们摸到月亮的时候,老猴子抬头发现月亮挂在天上呢。 He yells excitedly: "Don't be so foolish! The moon is still in the sky!" 它兴奋地大叫:“别蠢了!月亮还好好地挂在天上呢!” 2.生金蛋的鹅The goose with the golden eggs One morning a countryman went to his goose's nest, and saw a yellow and glittering egg there. He took the egg home. To his delight, he found that it was an egg of pure gold. Every morning the same thing occurred, and he soon became rich by selling his eggs. The countryman became more and more greedy. He wanted to get all the gold at once, so he killed the goose, when he looked inside, he found nothing in its body. 一天早晨,一位农夫发现自家的鹅窝中有一只金灿灿的蛋。 他将蛋带回家,惊喜地发现这是一个金蛋。 此后,农夫每天都能得到一个金蛋。从此,他靠卖他的金蛋变得富有起来。 农夫变得越来越贪婪,他想一下子得到鹅肚子中所有的金蛋。于是他杀死了鹅,但是,鹅肚子中什么也没有。 寓意: 如果不懂得知足,贪得无厌,我们就会失去已经拥有的东西。 3.老狮子与狐狸 The lion and the fox The lion once said that he was sick on his death bed. So he asked all the animals to come and listen to his last wishes. The goat came to the lion’s cave. He stood there and listened for a long time. Then a sheep went in. Before she came out, a rabbit entered to hear the last wishes of the king of beasts. But soon the lion seemed to recover, and went to the mouth of his cave. He saw a fox waiting outside. "Why don’t you come in?" asked the lion to the fox. "I beg Your Majesty’s pardon," said the fox, "I have seen many animals enter your cave, but none of them come out. Till they come out again, I prefer to wait outside." 一头年老的狮子声称自己病得要死了,他告诉所有的动物来听他的临终遗言。 一只山羊进入狮子的洞穴,并一直留在那里,接着一只绵羊也进去了。之前,一只兔子也曾进去听这兽中之王的临终遗言。 但是不久,狮子好像康复了,能走到洞口了,他看到狐狸站在洞口,就问:“你为什么不进来呢?” “尊敬的殿下,”狐狸回答说,“如果我没发现只有进去的脚印,没有一个出来的脚印,我也许会进洞去。”1分钟的英语小故事或小笑话?
老妈叫我翻译!!!(超强爆笑) !!! 今天我正在看碟,老妈又捧了本书进来,说道:给我讲讲这几句话什么意思 老妈:这个“i don’t know.“是什么意思? 我说:“我不知道” 老妈:送你上大学上了几年,你怎么什么都不知道!! 我说:不是!就是“我不知道”吗!! 老妈:还嘴硬!!!!$@%!#$^&%#$%@$%@#$%!^%^!^%$^#&..(一顿爆揍) 老妈:你在给我说说这个。“i know.“是什么意思你该知道吧,给我说说。 我说:是“我知道“ 老妈:知道就快说。 我说:就是“我知道“ 老妈:找茬呀你?刚才收拾你收拾的轻了是不? 我说:就是我知道呀! 老妈:知道你还不说!!不懂不要装懂!&*$%^@$#!%$@^%#*$^^^##$%(又一顿爆揍) 老妈:你给我小心点,花那么多钱送你上大学,搞的现在什么都不会,会那么一丁点东西还跟老娘摆谱,再问你最后一个,你给我好好解释一下,说不出来我在收拾你,你给我翻译一下“i know but i don’t want to tell you.“是什么意思? 我晕倒,拿起枕头往头上爆砸三十几下,用头撞墙四十多下,双手轮番抽自己嘴巴五十多下,用腿踢桌子角六十多下,血肉模糊之时,我问老妈:这下你满意吧 这不她老人家又来问我了:“儿啊,i`m very annoyance,don`t tuouble me .是什么意思啊~?“ 我:“我很烦,别烦我“ 老妈:“找打,跟你妈这么说话“(于是被扁) 老妈又问;“i hear nothing,repeat. 是what意思啊“ 我说:“我没听清,再说一次“ 老妈又说了一遍:i hear nothing,repeat“ “我没听清,再说一次“ 结果被扁 老妈再问:“what do you say “又怎么解释呢“ 我说:“你说什么“(再次被扁) 老妈再问:“look up in the dictionary“是何意啊’ 我说:“查字典“ “查字典我还问你做甚“(被扁) 老妈又问:you had better ask some body.怎么翻呢“ 我说:“你最好问别人“ “你是我儿子,我问别人干吗,又找打.“ “啊!god save me !“ “上帝救救我吧!” “耍你老妈玩,上帝也救不了你!(被扁) 我再问你:“use you head,then think it over,又是什么意思啊!“ 我说:“动动脑子,再仔细想想.“ “臭小子,还敢耍我“接着又要动手 我连忙说:“是世上只有妈妈好的意思” “嗯,这还差不多,一会我给你做好吃的,明天再问你”、一分钟英语小笑话
A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟简单的英语小笑话(带翻译)
1、Boy: Is this seat empty? Girl: Yes and this one will be if you sit down. 男孩:这个座位是空的么? 女孩:是的,如果你坐下,我的座位也将是空的。 2、Boy: Can I buy you a drink? Girl: Actually I'd rather have the money. 男孩:我可以给你买杯饮料吗? 女孩:你不如直接把钱给我得了。 3、My little dog can't read Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog! Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers! Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read. 我的狗不识字。布朗夫人:哦, 亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了! 史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊! 布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。”4、My Wife Will Exchange Them。A gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves. ″Cloth or leather﹖″ asked the salesperson. ″Makes no difference ″replied customer. ″What color﹖″ asked the clerk. ″Any″ he responded. ″Size﹖″ ″Give me whatever you prefer″ the gentleman said slightly exasperated. ″My wife will be back tomorrow to exchange them.″ 反正我太太明天会来换的。一位先生走进一家商店要买副手套。 “您是要布的还是皮的?”售货员问。 “没什么区别。”这位顾客回答。 “那您要什么颜色的呢?”售货员又问。“什么颜色都成。”他回答。 “号码呢?” “您就随便给我拿一副吧,”这位顾客有点不耐烦了,“反正我太太明天都会来换的。” 5、A physics Examination,Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard. The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunder rolls? Nick‘s answer: Because our eyes are before ears. 一次物理考试。在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。这个问题是:为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声?尼克的回答是:因为眼睛在前,耳朵在后。 6、Jim’s History Examination。Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination?Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him things that happened before the poor boy was born. 吉姆的历史考试。舅舅:吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样?母亲:唉,糟透了。可话又说回来,这也不能怪他。嗨,他们尽问一些这个可怜的孩子出生前的事儿。 7、he is really somebody。-- My uncle has 1000 men under him. -- He is really somebody. What does he do?-- A maintenance man in a cemetery. 他真是一个大人物。-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。-- 他真是一个大人物。干什么的?-- 墓地守墓人。